You’ve likely got regular appointments for Reiki, massage, Ayurveda, acupuncture, breathwork, or other energy healing. You’ve taken every yoga class under the sun, and maybe you’re into cold plunges. I’m guessing your phone is loaded with meditation apps, sleep apps, moon phase apps, astrology apps, and maybe even apps to track the planets and stars above.

You’ve maybe tried talk therapy, art therapy, movement, plant medicine, and dream work. You’ve read personal growth books (even if not cover to cover), taken online courses, and follow inspirational accounts on social media. You know your astrology big three, Human Design type, and have probably taken a stab at figuring out your Myers-Briggs, Enneagram, and love languages.

Of course, you’ve attended retreats—internationally, domestically, or weekend workshops—to explore your intuitive gifts, connect with nature, and take a break from daily life to recharge.

You’ve journaled intensely, filling about 60% of the pages in a library of beautifully bound journals, and now you’re not sure what to do with the rest. You’re actively working on reparenting your inner child, obviously. I bet you have gorgeous crystals on a makeshift altar at home or tucked into your bra (I see you, gf!). You diffuse essential oils to get your zen vibes going—maybe even made your own blends—and have organic soy wax candles around your bath for self-care.

You’ve probably burned sage and called it “smudging” during your smoke cleansing. You might charge your crystals under the full and new moons but skip eclipses. You’ve likely thought about calling in the directions, elements, archangels, ancestors, or spirit guides—and if you haven’t yet, you’re thinking about Googling it now.

You might study world wisdom traditions, spiritualities, or even practice organized religion—in your own way. You may devour the quotes and wise words of Carolyn Myss, Brené Brown, Glennon Doyle, Liz Gilbert, Rebecca Campbell, Vanessa Henry, and Pema Chödrön. And you probably listen to their podcasts as you walk in the morning or do dishes at sunset.

On your journey, you’ve likely had your tarot or oracle cards read, consulted the Akashic Records, or seen a medium. You might have a photo of your inner child on your altar, bathroom mirror, or in your journal to remind you of your progress and the love you deserve.

Perhaps you’ve trained in healing modalities that resonate with you, not only to help others but also to heal parts of yourself that still feel incomplete. You might identify as a space holder, healer, guide, coach, witch, shaman, alchemist, card reader, medium, or intuitive.

If you know me or have followed my journey, you know I truly get it. I am you, you are me, and we are we. I relate to many of these things, some historically, some currently. They can be profound paths or portals for growth, if they resonate with you. But even with all these tools, tips, tricks, and trainings, we often still search for that missing piece.

AND I AM PRETTY SURE I KNOW WHAT IT IS…

YOU’RE NOT LIVING YOUR TRUE SELF BY KEEPING YOURSELF ISOLATED.

IT’S TIME TO SHINE YOUR LIGHT IN COMMUNITY.

You don’t need another healing modality or more training to find your way. You don’t need to buy things to fill a perceived void in your soul because you are already whole. What you truly need is to be seen by other compassionate, like-hearted humans.

My fellow over-schedulers, anxious souls, homebodies, and “independent” types—those who cringe at the idea of putting on a bra or “real clothes”—listen up. We are all social creatures, coregulatory beings exchanging signals of safety that form powerful connections between our nervous systems. Interpersonal connection isn’t a luxury; it’s an evolutionary survival need.

If you’re still seeking that magical self-care tip, here it is: IT’S COMMUNITY CONNECTION & CARE—the real foundation for self-care. Like mushrooms that guide many of us to higher consciousness, we need consistent, reciprocal connection.

In my experience, gathering in supportive groups, whether in-person or virtual, can heal something deep within you that years of solo self-inquiry or even one-on-one therapy might not reach. As a sensitive soul who treasures solitude, I’ve found more rejuvenation and safety within intentional communities than through solitary work.

So, remember: you are the light, and your light shines brightest in connection with others, just like a candle burning alongside others.

Your social media feeds are likely filled with groups offering support. Consider local Meet-ups, real-talk book clubs, volunteer opportunities, or creating your own circle with those closest to you.

I lead a virtual group for women awakening to their true selves, and I witness this magic unfold in every cohort. Participants consistently attest to the transformative power of our gatherings. Come as you are—comfy lounge wear and all!

If this resonates with you, it might be time to join a group where you can be fully seen.

If you’re a woman seeking connection and an intimate circle to express your truth and witness others, consider applying for the upcoming Reawaken to Your Emergence Circle. Our group, limited to eight, will gather for ten weeks, starting September 12, 2024.

Applications are open now.